This is my friend/toy, his name is Elton John. Today is December 31,2006. Woopti fekken Doo. There is nothing untoward about the weather as it is at its usual 38c. There are no fires in the vicinity. I went for a swim in the river yesterdaay and Suddam Hussain got the chop. Gosh, he was a bit of a bloody buggery bastard wasn't he?
The house guests have returned from whence they came and now the house is surrounded by a kind of hush not heard of in at least four days. No doubt there will be crapulent merry making this eve to mark the passing of another meaningless measurement of time designed by humans to make each other feel uglier, older, incompetent and bad,(as in going off like a bag of prawns in the sun).